The Force is strong with him, Episode 1

Little known facts about the Stars Wars mythology, as told by Lucas:

• Proper pronunciation is "Dark Fagor", not "Darth Vader"
• Luke Skywalker dies
  
• Obi-Wan has a wife who also has a white beard
• The Jedi forces have an office, it's in a hole in a tree
  
• While still the toughest and most powerful Jedi in the whole world, Yoda actually resembles a baby who wears diapers
  
• Yoda's good friends can call him "Y-O-D-A", "Y-O", or in its simplest form, "Yo"
• General Grievous' alter ego is Lightning Shooter of the Moon

Lucas and his cronies at school propagate these truths, semi-truths, and made-up pieces of data about Star Wars. And to my knowledge, none of them have actually seen any of the movies. I assume it's more like a game of telephone where one kid hears something from an older sibling and it's passed on, with the true facts falling away as it makes its way through the playground.

Almost every time I pick up Lucas from school, there's a picture of something like this.
(Hint: DRC = Dark and FAGR = Fagor)

We play with the light sabers quite frequently in our house. Lucas is always Yoda, Luke Skywalker, or Obi-Wan. Kevin and I have played various characters from the Dark Side. My sister gave him a blue bath robe for Christmas, which he wears a lot, since he knows that Jedis wear robes.

At first I was asked to play Count Duku. Then I was asked to be Princess Leia, whose sole purpose seemed to be to cheer for the guys fighting with the light sabers. This was a very complex role for me to play. At first I was asked to cheer just for Lucas' character. Then seeing that this was probably not fair, Lucas would say to me, "Cheer for daddy too, but mostly for me." So I would say, "Go go go! But really go Yoda." Lucas said I wasn't doing it right and did some heavy coaching. I never seemed to strike the perfect balance in my cheering.

Then I was cast as General Grievous from the Dark Side, who I had to look up when Lucas first told me about him (he's in the newer episodes). But Lucas has since allowed me to cross over into the Light Side so I can learn to be a Jedi knight under his tutelage. He has given me a new name to go with my new identity, "Lightning Shooter of the Moon". He's coached me on proper usage of my light saber.

Last I checked, I'm "still human, but just one step away from being a Jedi". According to Lucas (aka "Y-O") once I reach Jedi status, I'll get a piece of paper that says "Jedi". I can't wait!