Thursday, August 31, 2006

Stay-at-home dad for a day and a poop breakthrough

Kevin stayed home today with Lucas. In the morning, Lucas trashed one of our lampshades and it just got more exciting from there.

Here's the IM exchange between me and Kevin this afternoon.

kevin: beans jus took a piss all over our bathroom floor
sunny_mckay: why?
sunny_mckay: was he trying to make it into the toilet?
kevin: no idea
sunny_mckay: did he do it on purpose?
kevin: he said he was sorry
sunny_mckay: oh, so probably not on purpose
kevin: but not sure how it could have been an accident
sunny_mckay: can you clean him and it up
kevin: yeah already did
sunny_mckay: did he not make it in time?
sunny_mckay: someimtes if he's peeing and talking to me at the same time, he turns his little monkey body and the pee goes outside of the toilet.
kevin: I asked him how it happened and he said "it just came out the end of my penis"
kevin: I gave him the benefit of the doubt
sunny_mckay: good
sunny_mckay: are you guys having fun?
kevin: yeah
sunny_mckay: do you want to be a stay at home dad?
kevin: fuck that
kevin: I wanted to strangle him 2 times already today
kevin: but now he is joyfully dancing around naked to the african music with the new butterfly net I got him
kevin: o and I got him 2 poopie toys
kevin: a helicopter and a jet

kevin: I told him he can play with them after he takes a dump in the toilet
kevin: we went to mr mops
sunny_mckay: cool
sunny_mckay: what are you guys doing?
kevin: beanie just shit on the floor and in his hand
kevin: we are having a very eventfull day
kevin: I told him is was ok as long as he is trying
kevin: so then he squeezed one more out in the toilet so he is now playing with his poopie reward helicopter
sunny_mckay: what do you mean? he shit on the floor, with pants on or off?
sunny_mckay: which floor?
kevin: in the living room
kevin: nude dude
sunny_mckay: shit!
kevin: shat right in the center of the room
sunny_mckay: what was he doing?
kevin: and in his hand
sunny_mckay: did he ask for a diaper?
sunny_mckay: what the fuck?
kevin: yeah
sunny_mckay: and you didn't give him the diaper?
kevin: no
sunny_mckay: what did he think about going in the toilet?
sunny_mckay: jesus, are you sure it's totally cleaned up?
kevin: he he just did another one all by himself
kevin: so proud
kevin: youd think he just got a nobel
kevin: man he shits allot
sunny_mckay: in teh toilet or on my pillow?
sunny_mckay: are you wiping his butt?
sunny_mckay: did he poop in the toilet the 2nd time?
kevin: yes
kevin: all by himself
sunny_mckay: did you wipe him?
sunny_mckay: he needs help with that
kevin: I think we had a major break through
kevin: so the deal with the poo toys is he gets them all day after he dumps in the toilet
kevin: then the next day he needs to earn them again
sunny_mckay: cool
sunny_mckay: did you wipe him?
kevin: yes with your pillow
sunny_mckay: seriously, you need to wipe him
kevin: actually I did the first 3 wipes then let him do the last after he was basically clean
kevin: but he gets the habit and the satisfaction of a job well done
sunny_mckay: good, nice job!
kevin: thx

Bottom line: Lucas pooped several times in the toilet over the course of the day. Even at his new school, where we went tonight for an orientation.

Lucas' last words on poop: While getting ready for bed, I told Lucas how proud we are of him that he went poop in the toilet. He said, "I sure am good at pooping in the toilet now!"

Lesson learned: Bribery works.

Big question: Will it last??


Heather said...

wow. the future is scary.

Whitney said...

my stomach is hurting from laughing. i'm so glad you shared the real sunny , the real kevin, and real adventures in parenting with the internet.